Half helping doesn’t help me out much. My husband, whom I love dearly half helps a lot of times and doesn’t get it when I get frazzled with his half helping. Here is an example of half helping.
Cailin has been feeling rotten while recovering from surgery. I understand that she hurts and she doesn’t know exactly how to express it. I had 2 loads of laundry to run that day. I got the second load into the washer and the first into the dryer and that was about it. When I do my laundry, I like to take things out of the washer and into the dryer, then out of the dryer a few items at a time and fold them or hang them up as I go. I try to get the dryer as soon as it finishes so things don’t get wrinkled. When I fold things, I fold them and separate into piles on top of the washer and dryer and move to appropriate rooms when they are all folded. This particular day, Chris came home from work. He half helped by taking the clothes out of the dryer, throwing them in a pile on top the washer and dryer and putting the stuff from the washer into the dryer. That was it. He didn’t offer to help fold the stuff on the washer. 2 days later, I get a break to finish laundry. I find the stuff that is piled on the washer waiting to be folded is mostly Chris’s work clothes, and a few of Cailin’s things. Since he half helped and took them out and threw them in a big pile, my options were to lug out my iron and ironing board and press all of his work clothes so they look nice for him to wear to work, or just throw them back in the washer and start the whole process over again. I opted for the 2nd because I hate ironing. There were some stuff that I could fold, however, I had no where to put everything as I folded them because the top of the washer and dryer were covered with all the clothes.
While I appreciate his ‘helping’, it would be better if he didn’t half help. Things would get done faster, things wouldn’t be laying around. The same is when he will take dishes to the sink, and not rinse them off, or not put them in the empty dishwasher. Cheese sauce is a pain in the arse to scrub off a plate or bowl once it has dried. So is French onion dip. I am not a fan of using my fingernails to scrub dried on food off dishes because someone can’t rinse them off. While I am on the topic of dishes, seriously, what is the deal with putting your dirty dishes on the counter on TOP of the dishwasher instead of in the dish washer. You are already right there, open the door and put them in!!! It isn’t that hard.
I now face the dilemma of Do I say gee honey, thanks for helping with laundry since he did take stuff out of the dryer and move more into the dryer? Do I tell him that his helping isn’t helping and risk that he doesn’t do a single thing any more? Do I put clothes that he puts on the dryer on hangers and let him wear it wrinkled and not say a word and let him figure it out? What’s a girl to do?
Do you have ‘half helpers’ in your house?
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I totally understand where you are coming from on both areas. Troy does the same exact thing. SO he no longer does the laundry. His laundry will sit, folded, but not put away, because I will not put it away for him. The dishes, that is still a work in progress.
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